2025
2024
Today Is My Birthday!
Today is my birthday, and as Drake and Vivian's mother, I find myself asking for the same thing every year. "Father, please..."
Grateful...
I don't know if I have ever been truly grateful for time. When you are young, all you think about is growing older. When you are older...
The First 24
The hours after Vivian's birth was a bit of a blur. We had decided to induce her around 39 weeks and three days due to me being dilated, and the now known genetic abnormalities that laid hauntingly in our genes. My OB ha
Vivian...alive; lively, bubbling with life
I typed in my search bar early this morning.."What does the name Vivian mean in the Bible?"....The search populated and it caught me with such sweet overwhelming assurance of Father's goodness...Wikipedia: Vivian means .
Failing FORWARD...
I avoided this day for weeks... I wanted so badly for him to be able to communicate, to show us something, to PROVE he was in there. In there the way we know he is, and finally to be able to show others his voice. I even
Vivian Update..Mother’s Day Evening
I am normally full of words… words that help make sense of things that have happened…words that bring understanding….words that I feel make things more clear.This weekend I am still trying to find those words…I can expla
Living in the Unexpected
Eric and I knew raising multiple children were going to be eventful. Raising five children, two with terminal diagnosis, is on a different
Jesus Moment in the ER
She looked at us and then with a exhale stated, “ I am just going to ask..." "Yes ma’am", we replied, not fully knowing what we were agreei
Vivian is home..
All Vivian’s levels stayed in really nice places after her infusion of red blood cells last night. Her ECG came back normal, and other than
Prayer Jar
Today, as I did my devotional I was reminded of the need for prayer.Honest, humble, expectant, desperately seeking Father’s will...prayers.I am often guilty of underestimating the power in prayer. The direct line to the
2023
Why Not Me?
Thanksgiving was this past week and like many of you, we are still recovering from all the wonderful food. This time of year is so fun as we know that certain dishes are only made close to the holidays. The kids and I en
Seven...The Year of Completeness
Your seventh birthday, Bubby. It is hard to understand all your little seven year old body has lived through. Last year when your heart..
His Peace
27 “Peace…I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.” - John 14:27Peace - (noun) - a state of tranquility or quiet. Fre
Being Comfortable in the Uncomfortable
If I could explain the last year in one word it would be …uncomfortable.It is hard to explain all that we have walked through over the last 15 months. After almost 7 years of terminal diagnosis, you would think uncomfort
O2 Crisis and Canceled Church Plans
Today we got up at 5:30 am, started our normal routine of getting showers, kids up, dressed and fed, Drake and Vivian’s meds and food made for the next few hours. Then Drake and Vivian up, cleaned and dressed for church.
Calm After the Storm
Our sweet girl finally started to settle around Saturday evening. Thursday and Friday the seizures had slowed to not consistently coming but to only clustering. Vivian started seizing Monday night, with no warning, every
Dead End Roads...
We took Vivian into the ER Wednesday night to have her evaluated. Her body was on day three of fever, hundreds of seizures, and throwing up. We had tried everything we normally do to get her system to reset, but nothing
It started Monday night...
Vivian started to seize ever 20 minutes shortly after I got home Monday night. I had meetings all day surrounding the foundation, growth meetings, networking meetings. We are constantly meeting to try to expand our reach
Update on Vivian..
Vivian fought hard all day and the seizures have been so relentless. She spiked a fever of 102.3 this am and we have done medicines and cool baths to try to get it to come down. Her little heart rate will spiked up to th
2022
Merry Christmas
In 2016, I stopped sending Christmas cards. Although our family had enjoyed this for years prior, I could not bring myself to take the professional family pictures that year. There is something about the word terminal be
Life is but a Vapor...
Yesterday I was sitting with our PT discussing some pretty severe issues we are seeing with Drake’s scoliosis and his poor little legs. His left leg is swelling and we aren’t sure of how or why. We are reaching out to ou
The Crippled Lamb and Crying Over Hamburger Meat
Ever heard the saying “don’t cry over spilt milk”... Well, last night I cried over hamburger meat. Before you try to guess, no I am not pregnant. And besides, I was never a super emotional pregnant lady....I was the "nau
You Made It To Three Little One...
Today is Vivian Faye’s Third Birthday...a birthday we were told she would never see. A birthday a few days ago, we were not sure if we would be celebrating hooked up in the hospital to all the cords and watching her seiz
Update: 20 Days Post-Cardiac Arrest
It has been twenty days since Drake’s heart stopped...unexpectedly....and twenty days since we got to witness our Lord and Savior move mightily to bring him back to us.If you missed reading about that miracle go to our M
Medical Miracle
It has been 10 days since our lives drastically took a turn. I think now that the dust has slightly “settled”, we can all start to try to process what in the world has happened. One thing that I am 100% certain of.... la
2019
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